In the eyes of men.

I find it amusing how men, who belong to the same species have such differing views. By coincidence, the topic of me as a person has been brought up by various men (who do not know each other) over the past week or so. Therefore, I beg you to indulge little old moi a little narcissism.

Let’s start from my oldest set of male friends. I’ve been pals with J and K since I was 15 and 13 respectively. They are my drinking buddies. They call me “bro” and there are negative laws of attraction amongst us three. They always poke fun at me, and tell me not to open my mouth because my loud voice and raucous laughter will scare any potential suitors away. They also tell me no man will approach me because I can drink any of them men under the table and this causes intimidation. According to them, no men likes to be outdrank and have their egos bruised. Ok, noted.

Then, I was recently let in on a big secret (which wasn’t really a secret because I already knew it from gut feel) and this person said he felt like he could trust me because of the way I am. In his words, I’m open-minded, non-judgemental (I judge everybody in my head anyway), trusting (from the way I tell my life story to anyone who will listen) and prove that I’m trustworthy through my behaviour and actions. I have also proven to be a friend in need, thus, bonus points to me. Unfortunately, people like me tend to fall under a certain category coined by them, and we tend to be supposedly single, unmarried or divorced. Well, that’s just great, isn’t it?

Just this evening, I happened to send something funny to X (yes, he’s still around, almost apparition-like) and we had a short conversation. I told him what man above said about me and he disagreed completely. Again, in his own words, he said that I score full marks when it comes to self-presentation. More accurately, the word he used was “deportment”. He said I’m fashion forward (which I don’t agree but maybe to him I’m some trend-setter), with nice hair and always manicured nails, plus with my Ferragamos and Chanel (swear he was being a tad sarcastic), how can I be like how I was described? He says he comes to me for any “fashion” advice, so, how can I not be poised in his eyes. Oh beating heart! Please allow me a moment to collect my thumping heart. He also refuted claims of the three men above that I talk and laugh loud. I told him maybe because he hasn’t seen that side of me.

Next, my new colleague. He seems to stick to me a lot, and I don’t mind because he’s such a likeable boy. He told me that I enliven the entire team with my personality and he feels like he can really connect. Well, bless his little heart. Later, I met an ex-colleague and proudly repeated them nice words. And he agreed. He said my ex-company isn’t the same after I left. He also said a room brightens whenever I’m in it. Such flattery, but it’s working, I’m on cloud nine.

Isn’t it bizarre how one of us can elicit so many perceptions from the same kind? It’s interesting to find out because it’s not as if we walk around demanding people to tell us what they think or feel. I’m so glad that most of these comments put me in a glowing light (except my two mean friends). I’m going to sleep well tonight, and every time I feel like shit, I should revisit this post. Go. Go ask your friends too.



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