Merde.

Him. The subject whom everyone is interested in (myself included though my interest differs from the rest). By now everyone knows that I’ll be heading to Paris in 25 (totally not prepared…) days and meeting him there.

I’ll be the first to admit to having a dirty mind. I’m the kind of friend whom everyone has who can turn a perfectly innocent comment/sentence into something sleazy. But I’m in no way a conniving person who would do things to turn a situation to my advantage. For example: I will not make a person drunk on purpose because I want to have my evil ways with him, BUT if things happen naturally, I may or may not stop it. See the point I’m trying to drive here?

There are people around me who in my opinion are far worse than me. They don’t crack dirty jokes or swear but the things that come out from their mouths. Even though I see no need to explain myself, I have already made it clear to these people that him and I are just friends and will remain this way (until maybe one day he’s possessed, wakes up and decides that I’m the one) in the hopes of getting them off my back. Obviously I thought wrong.

They try to hatch and plant evil thoughts in my head the various ways I can “make him mine in Paris”. Omg people, stop right there. I think I’m perfectly capable of hatching my own evil plots should there be a need to, so I don’t need your “help”. And do they even realise what they are saying?! Yes there’s a gender bender here but how different are they from any accomplices in a rape case?

I may be potty mouthed and liberal in certain ways but I will never force a person to do things against their will because I believe that there is no joy in coercion.

And to be honest, whatever happens (or does not) between us is our problem. I really don’t see why you should be bothered with the nitty gritty in my life in order for you to have a conversation with me. I know they are just dying for me to go and return and hopefully provide salacious details. Nope. Not happening. In case you didn’t know, I don’t kiss and tell. Not that it’s going to really happen, it’s just a description.

I’m not sure myself what’s it going to be like the month I’m there and I keep reminding myself to hold myself together when I see him (because you all know I’m such a wuss and may fall deeper and deeper even though what I really need to do is to extricate myself and get the hell out). In fact, the bigger concerns I have are not even close to matters of the heart. I’m more worried about safety, baggage space, how I totally did not plan my days there and whether I’ll go mad and spend every single cent to my name.

Him? That’s like the least of my priorities for now.

xoxoxoxo.

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