The prelude to my nightmare.

So I went out for dinner in a tee shirt and a pair of shorts I only wear at home. I didn’t have a trace of makeup on my face, was wearing spectacles and my hair was unkempt. The plan was to return home after dinner for a shower and to get ready for a night out. Somehow the plans changed. The dinner took much longer than it was expected. I didn’t have time to go home. I had to go out in whatever I was wearing. Worst of all, he was there. Omg I want to dig a great big hole in the ground and hide there till the night is over. All that was running through my mind the whole time was what he was going to think of me.

Then, I woke up with a start. Omg was that terrifying or what?! Thank the lord above it was only a nightmare. When I told my sister, she laughed and said “That’s not considered a nightmare! A nightmare is when maybe you get chased or something scary happens.” Well, it is to me.

I’ve always prided myself on being presentable at all times and I chant the mantra “You’ll never know who you’re going to meet” to whoever who’s listening. I own a grand total of two pairs of flip flops; one in the trunk for days at work when both pairs of shoes get rain-soaked, and the other for when I have to change out of shoes for my monthly nail sessions.

I get frustrated and uncomfortable when my clothes get wrinkled or stained, will change to going out kind of tops and shorts even if I have to run down to collect something from the car and cannot stand repeating my clothes too often.

My family has unanimously voted me as the vain pot and laugh when I, in their terms, “dress up” to go to the nearby mall. I don’t see anything wrong with wanting to look nice all the time. They can look sloppy all they want but it’s just not my style.

One of my ex-es (see, that’s the reason why he’s in the past tense) used to ask who I was trying to impress. I’m not trying to impress anyone at all but I feel better when I know I look nice. I used to also tell him that’s it’s a form of respect for him and wouldn’t he feel proud if people associated him in a positive manner because I’m with him? Tsk Men. They just don’t get it.

I know there are more things to be concerned about in this world than wondering of what to wear tomorrow. But, this is my priority and interest and no one should control what I should think or do. Ok. Now I sound totally shallow and bimbotic.

He has specifically told me to “dress like a beggar if you can” when I go to Paris. I know he’s not asking me to dress in rags nor is he making fun of them but is telling me to tone down my dressing. It is a challenge. I don’t know how to do down. Monochromatic themes are not my strong suit either. This is proving to be a real nightmare. Nooooooooo….



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