In the spirit of the love season,
Happy Valentine’s Day!
Happy Singles’ Awareness Day!
Yes. Let’s spare a thought for the many single souls out there. As it is, there are already one too many smug couples out there and restaurants which indirectly call anyone who’s not physically welded at the hip a loser (some only serve couple set meals), so no. We really don’t need you to do the equivalent of installing neon signs pointing to you and your partner. I mean, I’m single but I don’t walk around swinging my panties over my head and taking out an ad in the papers to announce my status right?
I spent the day working if you must know. There are also a few things I noticed about this day. First, I must clarify that I’m no expert on the topic of lurrvvveeee, seeing that I’m single and dateless this year, last year and the years dating all the way back to the days of Genghis Khan. These are just some of my observations from my non-biased, nonchalent, non-participatory and none-of-my-business experienced years of being a swinging single.
The “shy” types
I understand not everyone is an extrovert, but if you like someone, tell them. Watching and following one’s move on social media is not cool (unless you just met this person and want to find out more without coming across as too aggressive). In layman’s terms, this could also be what we deem as socially inappropriate- stalking. Tell them. If you get rejected, move on. And at least you now know the sad truth. And being creepy by bringing up events when you were not there in person but found out through photos and comments is just plain wrong. And if that doesn’t spell loser, I don’t know what will.
The “It’s complicated” status
Ermmm no. It’s either you’re in a relationship or you’re not. By putting such a status, it simply means that the other party 1) does not see you as a priority but an option, 2) they’re being douches, 3) you allow yourself to be strung along for douche behaviour. Get. Out. Now. No excuses. Now. Some people might think I’m a fine one to speak since I’m the one who’s in a long-drawn battle. The difference is X has made it clear to me and our demarcation is clear as day. And I’m putting a longer line out to catch the bigger fish.
The “If-you-love-me-you-will __________.”
Once again, NO. I’m always half fascinated and half mortified when I hear things like this. Like “if you love me you’ll stop smoking”, “if you love me you must do this that fly to the sun climb mount everest remove your intestines for me”. No, no and no. If you love someone, you wouldn’t make such requests in the first place. Say whatever you want about it being for their own good, but you’re really asking it for your own sake. If a person wants to change, it should be because they’re doing it for themselves and not you. Sorry if it hurts, but you know it’s true.
Have you noticed how sheepish and embarrassed some men look presenting flowers? Worse is when they end up holding the stupid bouquet because the girl has no arms/ thinks you should carry her handbag, shopping and flowers because she’s a princess/ you’re wuss to say no, carry your own god damn flowers. Many men I know buy flowers for the lady because “everybody is doing it”. Excuse me, what are you? One of the mice in Pied Piper of Hamelin? So what if she lovessssss flowers and every girl in the office is receiving some? If you’re comfortable with it, by all means, go ahead. But if you’re not, don’t do it because you think you have to. What’s the worse that could happen? Her sulking for two days? So be it. Her picking a fight? Let her be. Threatening or issuing a breakup? Even better.
I could go on until the next year rolls around, really. But who am I to put a dampener on your parade?
Happy Valentine’s Day, Mon cherie.