Act like nothing’s wrong.

The past two weeks have been unbelievably hectic. Am part of the committee that organises our company’s bi-annual cycle meet and it has been one crazy ride.

All that planning was worth it though. There were no glitches (though some tension was unavoidable), and the team (all three of us) received many thank yous, well dones and good jobs. I’m just glad it’s over.

From Monday to Wednesday, I’ve had to wake up at 5, 6, and 7am respectively. My job has spoiled me, I’m not used to wake up before 7am.

And because of this meeting, my health has been put on hold. The Quantiferon test results came back positive. But the doctor still cannot confirm if I have TB. He still wants me to get that biopsy done just in case it is indeed cancerous. And if it’s not, we’ll find out what it really is and medicate accordingly.

I’m going to visit this fengshui lady tomorrow to find out my outlook for this year. And see if there’s an “auspicious” hour for getting the biopsy done. I’m not that superstitious but it’s better to be safe than sorry.

The most agonising thing would first be the cost of the biopsy, then the procedure itself, followed by the two day wait for the results. It’s like waiting for a death sentence. Kind of.

The silver lining of this has been the support I’ve been receiving. My manager has assured me not to worry about work and even offered to drive me to and from the hospital.

My parents still do not know. X calls me stubborn when I told him my reasons for not telling them. I just don’t want to give them something else to worry about. I know I cannot hide it forever, but let’s wait till the biopsy results are out.

X has been great though. Because there’s no one else, he has been my pillar. He tries to keep my spirits up and doesn’t allow me to worry unnecessarily and assures me that he’s very sure I will be fine. Let’s hope his confidence shadows the uncertainty.

I cannot help but fall for him more and more. Help.


Our company's gala dinner theme: Shanghai Night.


With my awesome team mates. Yes we all bought the same dress.


Bet you can't tell but I barely ate the whole night because I had to hold my stomach in because the dress was tight lol.

Will update when I have updates. Wish me tons of luck.



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