Go have your fun but go away. Far far away.

Why would someone tell someone else about their near sexual escapade, in almost vivid detail?

From my emo nemo tone, anyone can tell that I’m that someone else. Have been fairly disturbed by what X told me a couple of days ago. So he went to some NYE party and got accosted by both species of the human race.

What he chose to tell me in technicolour though, was what the female did to him. To be fair, he’s straight, so therefore maybe he didn’t want to talk about being hit on by another man.

Short of doing the doo and exchanging saliva and other bodily fluids, he said they were feeling each other up. In his own words, the female was rubbing herself all over him (wonder what her boobs felt like) and he, being an actor, reciprocated. Right.

Now, I know I’m not entitled to have an opinion in this because we are after all, just friends. But, my dear friends, you all know that I am starting to like him. Ok who the fuck am I kidding, I’m more than starting to fancy him.

So even though that incident was none of my fucking business, I have to admit that I’m a tad jealous. Which I’m angry at myself for. I have no right to feel this way because we’re (altogether now)- just friends.

So because I don’t like schmucks and don’t want to end up being one, I’ve put some deep thought into closing this chapter. I never like to end things without trying hard enough but I don’t have the stomach nor the heart nor the strength to sit and watch us ding donging back and forth anymore.

And anyway, what was the whole fucking point in telling me all that anyway? To make me jealous? Congratulations, you have succeeded. Spectacularly. Good for you, because I saw no point in it. Nothing happened hoo-fucking-ray but that didn’t stop that weird feeling from clutching its cold hand around my heart.

Why do people see the need to share their conquests? Only buddies share these with each other. And I don’t want to be your buddy. I give you points for being utterly honest with me though. Such a breath of fresh air, honestly.

xoxoxoxo.

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